It’s very common to hear someone utter “I can’t believe I did that to myself!” during a weight loss journey. All too often, we are our own worst enemies. There are many reasons why people sabotage themselves. Let’s explore two of the most common reasons – self-perception and fear.
Self-perception
One of these reasons for self-sabotage is how we feel about ourselves. The spectrum of those feelings can range anywhere between self-hatred to narcissism. Regardless, it is our own internal voice, how we truly feel about ourselves deep inside, that guides our thoughts and subsequent behaviors.
For example, if we suffer from low self-esteem, or worse yet, self-loathing, our inner dialogue will reflect a script of unworthiness. In this case, we are often guided by our own critical inner voice.
When that critical inner voice is loud, it can interfere with our ability to implement and succeed in self-supportive actions and goals, one of the biggest of which is weight loss.
While some may think this ridiculous, after all a voice like that is destructive and any smart person would shut it down, the truth is that it’s easier said than done. Afterall, the human psyche and our emotional and mental states are quite complex.
That voice can trick us with subliminal dialogue that can be rather deceptive. For example, instead of directly telling us, “You don’t deserve to lose weight and be healthy,” it will instead sabotage us with flattery and seemingly self-supportive statements…
“It’s okay, you’ve got this, you lost 15 pounds already, you can handle a piece of cake”
“Wow look how much willpower you have, get off that diet already, you’re doing great
“You’re tired and stressed, take the day off from exercising”
“You’ve had a long day, you’re too tired to cook, go ahead, and grab a burger and fries”
This dialogue appears self-supportive and complimentary, when in fact it’s really just leading back to self-defeat.
As the dialogue continues, and we follow, it takes us further and further from the goal. Then when we fail once again to achieve the goals we have set for ourselves, that voice kicks us hard, “what a loser,” “ha, you failed again,” “you can’t do anything right,” which only goes to feed the negative perception we have of ourselves.
As sad and painful as this sounds, we become used to this type of inner dialogue and allow it to control our actions, after all it reflects how we feel about ourselves. We become comfortable with it and it continues.
Fear
Fear is a powerful emotion. It can make even the strongest and bravest of man cower, and often it holds us back from achieving what we yearn for. In regards to weight loss, fear is often a significant driving factor for self-sabotage.
- Fear of the unknown
- Fear of failure
- Fear of change
- Fear of something new
- Fear of the effort it takes to change habits and lifestyle
- Even fear of how a new body may change our lives
- Fear that if we lose all the weight, we will gain it back and hate ourselves
These are very real considerations that require introspection and confrontation on the deepest levels within ourselves.
In order to overcome these self-sabotaging habits, it’s important that you recognize them and confront them head on. When you find yourself on the precipice of self-sabotage, try to find a friend or family member to discuss your feelings with instead.
